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THE FUTURE

I ACCEPT SOLICITATIONS! ALL SOLICITATIONS!

LONG
  • Demon of Crosstonross
  • Elf Confidence
  • Mizzenmast
  • Dark Country
  • Divenska Dreams of Kings and Queens
  • Street of 2 Doors (erotic)
  • Harem story - servant girl in man-harem, fantasy
  • Lesbian school girls - college
  • Exodus style camp
  • Necromancer story
  • Creationstyle kids story with the dinosaur pals!
  • Zeem through the underworld (supernaturals are getting killed by a "collector"
  • Rania, Aphen, Anton
  • Steampunkvamp
  • Girl meets sky-pirate who comes to his school
  • Dead grandmother's book re. vampire has girl make vamp friend.
  • Honorable Ladies society, investigation of murder and society
ZEEM THROUGH THE UNDERWORLD
  • Fauns & Pan
  • Frankie Goes To Perugia (Luminael & St Francis of Assissi)
  • King of the Air (Zeem's ex girlfriend and how he ended up where he is)
  • Zeem in Africa with Mama Wati
  • Chinese dragon crash lands...
SHORT
  • (-) Chairman Mao in the future controlling a town with Communism
  • (Mizzenmast) Location, Location - a flying house crashlands in a crap neighbourhood
  • (New Persia) Message of the White Deev (eroticesque)
  • (New Persia) Story of thief (fantasy) who works like Gig, hacking people
  • (-) Religious priesty story I don't know what yet but I like stories like that
  • (Mizzenmast) Stinker Tinker in trouble with Morality
  • (-) Schitzophrenic chick with goblins who give her powers!
  • (-) Girl falls in love with a plant
  • (-) Hit list of 10 uploaded photos. Detective races to find the people and prevent killage.
  • (Mizzenmast) Large Hadron Collider invention to get rid of things. Jessica!
  • (-) A world sans abortion. Article-style.
  • (-) Righting antarctic shelf - avec MW
  • (-) Wife steals husband's affair
  • (New Persia) Woman sells men to country folk
  • (Mizzenmast) Carrying a virus as a weapon.
  • (Mizzenmast) Hunting AIs like old English families
  • (-) Eros fighting with Cupid over who gets to fill the world with love
  • (-) Letters from Utopia
  • (-) Girl meets sorcerer who turns into fat persian cat
  • (-) Gay Clockworld-themed story about Josie/football/planetary fun
  • (-) Person recognises murderer from childhood events and knows them.
  • (-) Two kids with amulets who can see each other through time
  • (-) Love affair, one lives in the Victorian/Regency/Renaissance/whatever era, one in the present day
  • (Mizzenmast) A huge Skein through which you can see ocean animals
  • (-) Two guys, one lake (erotic hopefully)
  • (Mizzenmast) Prostitutes in the city, real ones...
  • (-) Modern day Hansel & Gretel
  • (-) Morphing kid... maybe YA?
  • (-) Guy who investigates fake internet deaths.
  • (-) Dream interpreter
  • (-) "If a man looks on our bodies and is turned into an animal we should not cover up. We should take his eyes."
  • (-) Edison vs Kesla
  • (-) VR kiddies get date IRL
  • (-) Plague of rabbits
  • (-) Kid who can see things that nobody else can (future vision maybe)
  • (Mizzenmast) Jean and Nazri
  • (-) A giant mechanical squid enters the Tempest
  • (-) Australian vampires?
  • Monorail
  • handy person who comes in to fix broken down people
  • washerwomen running about in hi-house land
  • aesop fucks about with romans
  • Chickadee is a non magic person in magic world, private eye!
  • hockey girls playing hockey andbeating up monsters
  • lovecraftian choose your own adventure
  • zombies and brady
SCREEN PLAYS
  • Geeks rule the universe
CURRENTLY PIMPING...
  • (-) How I Got To Be Employee Of The Month
  • Wifetime

The Zeem novel continues :)

I had to dump this in in plain text, because another hilarious thing about Open Office is that if you don't save it in the right format originally (I started doing Zeem before I realised OO is a fucking fuck) and put in your own excellent styles and shit, it will cut and paste in here in a terrible fucked up way.

But anyway.

Here's Zeem. No italics, and you know how much Zeem and I love them, but I hope it's readable without.

zeem chapters 1 and 2. the next one is called the hunter's bestiary!Collapse )

what the ever loving shit is this.

seriously. what the shit is this.

what the shit

It begins with a tempest.

The wild waters roar, the sky pours down stinking pitch.

In the midst of the storm is a boat, floundering, its crewmen fearful and mutinous.

There is also a giant metal squid.

. . .

Then it is a day later.

The giant squid climbs out of the ocean and clanks its way onto the beach of Prospero’s island, shaking water from its bulk. It walks upright, as a spider might, its spade-headed tentacles kicking up clouds of sand with each step. Caught in its beak and its foremost tentacles are the remains of a boat.

The squid’s size makes a toy of the vessel: the mast is a toothpick; the topsail a torn rag.

The only living thing to witness the squid’s emergence is the red-haired mooncalf, who has been hiding in the tufted pampas that line the beach. He stands as the squid approaches, a hand fluttering at his throat.

The squid halts a few metres from the frightened mooncalf and inclines toward him, steam puffing from the cracks of its metal hide. Presently a hatch opens at the centre of its mantle, and a woman’s head appears.

‘What-ho,’ says the woman.

The mooncalf is rooted to the spot. A sheen of fearsweat appears on his skin, which is creamy-white and freckled like the underbelly of a rare fish. He would scream for his Master, but the words have frozen in the pit of his collarbone. To bring them up now would be to choke on them.

‘Ran into a nasty spot of weather in the Gulf of Aden,’ says the woman conversationally. “Storm came out of nowhere. Name’s Votive. Who’re you?”

‘Caliban,’ gasps the mooncalf. “Art thou a demon?”

“No,” says Votive. “I’m a scientist.”



WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT IS THIS
I promised 4 chapters. I know what happens in chapter three, but thinking about it, I have no idea about part four. What happens, really? I just don't know.

Chapter three is Xiaoping's adventuresi n MENTAL TOWN

But for four, should War get a chapter? Or should it be back to Josie? Probably not Aubrey. Or maybe everyone? 

Clockworld is really fantastic btw, it's my wriitng at its most awesome, even if nothing much happens.

Thoughts on the back of a postcard luvers. :D
will be in phantasmacore

have to say I'm bloody loving the whole sell-from-my-website option. clearly this is the most awesome way to pimp your reprints. no effort on my part required.

love in the time of the serpent king didn't get much attention when it came out and it's not a bad story. it's technically a zeemverse story (in much the same way four parties is) but it doesn't have zeem in it. although amusingly i scraped most of the story from one of his backstory stories. lollerpants much.

anyway

COME ONE COME ALL AND BUY MY AWFUL STORIES

guess that is the stress off me and deirdre to get something together for the deadline but would still like to make that story happen...




on the short story side i have that story, plus a horror thing with mz kirsty that i totally haven't touched, nothing else yet tho.




my published credits list is starting to look really dumb. it's like over 50 in the past four years, and that's only the ones that fit under those two aliases, rj and joanne. 




i'm enjoying writing zeem. horrors i know. maybe it's because i'm coming to terms with the fact he's actually an alright character (especially now that my scifi stuff WHICH IS MY TRUE LOVE is getting love). andy has been reading bits of it and his comments are LOL he cries so much and he's so fat. YES WELL zeem was never fucking conan the barbarian...

have a lot of stuff out in dec but

primarily...

Clockworld is out
http://www.wildeoats.com/ClockWorld-by-Joanne-Smyth-01.html
http://www.wildeoats.com/ClockWorld-by-Joanne-Smyth-02.html
It has some of my best writing in it and at least one of my best characters. However, the magazine it's in loves Comic Sans. I don't know why. It really upsets me! It's awful to look at but the editors are super nice :( So if I were you I'd just copy it off the magazine into a word document, and then change the font for readability. I swear it's worth it.

FOS
http://crossedgenres.com/serial/
FOS yey. It is a terrible thing and also purchaseable on Amazon! My mother hasn't spoken to me since getting her copy (I think) which means she's probably disowning me as we speak. Sigh. Well at least it has white people in it. As main characters. That's something, right?

ZEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEM
http://www.electricspec.com/issues/volume-5-issue-4-november-30-2010/johnny-and-babushka-by-rj-astruc.asp
The latest in the Zeem series, part 5. I really love this one, actually, it's one of the better Zeem stories. Electric Spec was on my list of FUCK YOU markets which never published me but now, hahahaha, I have overcome by being awesome and I am also the lead story. (Electric Spec published Fees des Dents, one of the motherfucking awesome fantasy stories I've read in years, so it is nice company.)

Only Futurismic left on the places I would like to be in.

Working on Zeem at the moment. I'm enjoying writing him, because he's so fucking fundamentally unlikeable.

Clarity.

I didn't think I'd do this. But I have. After seven years of being unable to write with the clarity I once had, without that BRAIN-thinkyness that made things slot into place so goddam perfectly... I have done what I should have done seven years ago.

I took some nicotine.

Here is the truth.

I am not complete without my addiction.

I am not me.

I have not been me for seven fucking years.

There is nothing fucking like this.

If you are a fucking addict there will be nothing EVER more wonderful than your addiction.

Ever.

And you only live once so GODDAMIT.

BE FUCKING HAPPY.

BE FUCKING HAPPY.






Three hours later, I have the completed first chapter of the Zeem novel.

 
Here it is.Collapse )

I will from hereon

attempt to respond promptly to all requests for fiction.

I generally get at the very least two requests for stories for magazines every month (sometimes two a week, like this week AHHHHH). In the interests of being a better person I'm going to attempt to respond to all of them. I'm trying to turn the writing thing into more of a solicited-fiction rather than me having to go out and pimp, anyway, which is why I've put up my full backlist for people looking for reprints at www.rachelastruc.com . I think of that as a kind of online catalogue and also a portfolio. It seems to work thus far.

I may try to work out some way of advertising what I have currently as new fiction as well that people can nab when I complete it or poke me to complete for anthologies, etc. Not sure about how to do that yet though.

I know other people out there want to get stuff out and I really would like more people on my very short list of co-writers who can help me pull together fiction for mags. Please contact me if you'd like some published credits and possibly a bit of pocket money into the bargain. I get some people who say yes and then they go away and it's not exactly what I'm after. :/



I know this problem could be solved obviously and completely if I was a faster writer and got more stuff done, but I'm really not and the quality of my writing suffers dramatically the more I pimp out.

But yeah. Anyway.

I PROMISE FROM NOW ON THAT YOU WILL ALMOST CERTAINLY GET THE FICTION YOU REQUEST.

fans

I googled myself and I have fans.

Scary shit yo

please note to people who'd like to buy some of my stuff

that link will take you to my out of print catalogue ie everything i hold the rights to again. you can now read and buy at thy leisure. yeyyy.

also contains stories in terms of their "arc" so they're collected by groups of characters, usually in date order.

please note it only dates back to late 2006

so there's a lot of other stuff i've done floating around from before that and a few other bits and pieces in different genres.

What the fuck Cory Doctorow

So apparently I write just like Cory Doctorow. I just had horrors at reading a passage from his book For the Win:

Connor Prikkel sometimes thought of maths as a beautiful girl, the kind of girl that he'd dreamt of wooing, dating, even marrying, while sitting in the back of any class that wasn't related to math, daydreaming. A beautiful girl like Jenny Rosen, who'd had classes with him all through high school, who always seemed to know the answer no matter what the subject, who had a light dusting of freckles around her nose and a quirkly half-smile. Who dressed in jeans she'd tailored herself, in t-shirts she'd modded, stitching multiple shirts together to make tight little half-shirts, elaborate shawls, mock turtlenecks.

Jenny Rosen had seemed ot have it all: beauty and brains and, above all, rationality: she didn't like the way that store-bought jeans fit, so she hacked her own. She didn't like the t-shirts that everyone wore, so she changed the shirts to suit her taste. She was funny, she was clever, and he'd been completely, head-over-heels in love with her from sophommore English right through to senior American History.


Compare this to a passage of mine:

Valery didn’t know whether it was school spirit or some form of communal masochism that brought in the Hartbridge crowds, or perhaps even a little bit of both? He knew why he’d be going though. In fact, just thinking about the why made him feel simultaneously queasy and excited, the type of feeling you got at the top of a roller-coaster during those terrible, wonderful seconds before the fall. The why had a name: Ingemar Vladistov. Dark, foreign Ingemar, from Mr Grecio’s first year Remedial Mathematics class, who never knew the right answers to anything but always put up his hand regardless; who wore a school jumper a size or two too big so it always fell low over his left shoulder in a way Valery couldn’t decide was cute or plain goofy; who always touched his mouth when he was annoyed, as if to try and physically stop the anger from spilling forth.

Ingemar was probably the closest Hartbridge would ever get to a bona fide sports star; and probably the closest Valery would ever get to him would be three desks to the right.


Just for reference - For the Win came out in 2010. Mine was published in 2008, so there's no chance of me being influenced.

What the fuck eh. It's the same goddam construction.

(I hate his old stuff I think it's shithouse and make of monkey shit and fourteen year old I JUST LEARNT A WORD lulz bullshit, but this new one is actually pretty good.)